THE NEGATIVE EFFECT OF COMPARISON IN CHILDREN PART 1

1. It makes the non-favored child(ren) to build a carefree attitude: when we constantly ignore our children’s talents/achievement then they may not bother wanting to please their parents anymore since the parents clearly favor the other child who has more “appropriate” achievements

2. Comparison leads to Distance: If we as parents always compare our child(ren) with their siblings, cousins, family friends children or neighbor children negatively the child will only develop the notion that he/she has something that is not accepted by you. The hurt the child feels will only make him/her stay away from you and the feeling of insecurity and loss of trust in you(parents) will lead to developmental or behavioral problems as the child grows up. 

3. It fosters sibling rivalry: When you compare your child(ren) with each other rather than praising each child individuality may lead him/her to behave aggressively, pick fights, tease and even hit each other which will gradually eat into their relationship negatively.

4. Stress: when a child is always being compared to his or her siblings. It will make the child feel burdened. As parents we shouldn’t pressurize our children to perform or make them feel stressed or anxious in anyway. If we need a child to become better at something then it is our obligation as parents to talk to the child about it or find out if there is something bothering the child then device ways to provide solution. 

5. Lowers self esteem:  If we are told by someone that we are not good at something and that there are others out there who are excellent at it, gradually self-doubt will begin to set in. Comparison makes the child to start believing that others are better than him/her and that he/she doesn’t have what it takes to perform well or living up to his parents standard/expectations. This feeling or mindset will damage the child’s personal and academic growth.

To be continued…

Yours truly,
Toke

TIPS FOR PARENTING
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