We shouldn’t see failure as a source of pain, regret or disappointment in our child(ren) instead, see it as an opportunity for him or her to show more intelligence. Failure is not the moment to run our children down with our words or totally write them off especially in their growing stage. Not many parents respond to their children failures well.
My mum never went back to school because she failed a class. I also remember how my father threatened to stop my education and send me to learn a trade if I dare fail a class again.
No child takes pleasure in failure. When I failed in primary three, I felt so ashamed. I was not happy I failed especially seeing my mates go ahead of me. Most times I try to avoid them in the school premises (especially my friends) I couldn’t raise my head up high.
Some parents will say it will make the child to buckle up without spending the time to know how the child is feeling and where he or she is having problem. Some children go to the extent of committing suicide while some will practically tell you they don’t want to return back to school (because they can’t handle the shame from friends and parents).
If failing is a crisis to them then, it must be for us as parents too. If we allow them give up on themselves now, how do we want them to handle what life will throw at them later?
We must as parents see things from our children perspective if we are going to help them cope. We have to let them know that they have every right to feel devastated, disappointed and angry at their failure. But they should also know that you understand how they feel and you are not surprise they feel that way. All in all, they shouldn’t dwell on their present failure because the future holds more great opportunity for them to do better.
Its our parental duty to help them feel better the best way we can, so that, they can climb up and out of their swamp of despair. We should not to eat them up because they failed an examination or performed poorly in a school debate. We all failed at a point in our life.
Our children’s ability to handle failure at a point in their lives depends on us parents in building the right foundation. If they fail, we should build in them to have the courage and resilience to try again with wisdom gained from the experience.
It should be a great opportunity for us parents to teach them to have a game spirit in life that we don’t always have to win sometimes we lose. Letting them know it’s not the end of the world for them when they loss or fail. It’s vitally important for their growth.